How will we handle screen time in early childhood?

Once upon a time, the advice was simple: no screens before age two. Then smartphones happened. And tablets. And pandemic lockdowns. And “Bluey.” So now, if you’re an expecting couple trying to wrap your head around screen time for your future baby, the answer to “Are screens bad?” is... a little complicated.

Let’s unpack that, without panic, guilt, or grand pronouncements.

The AAP weighs in (and then softens slightly)

The American Academy of Pediatrics once said: zero screens under age two, except for video chatting. And that’s still a good general rule: babies learn best by exploring the world and interacting with you, not a tablet.

But in recent years, the guidance has evolved. The AAP now encourages very limited, high-quality screen use, co-viewed with a parent or caregiver. Think FaceTiming Grandma, not hours of Cocomelon. Why the shift? Because they know real life happens, and parenting is full of trade-offs.

The key idea: content matters, context matters, and connection matters most.

So… do screens melt baby brains?

No. But also: kind of? Let us explain.

Most studies are observational, meaning they can show that kids who watch more TV may have lower test scores or more behavioral issues, but they can’t tell us why. Maybe it’s the screens. Maybe it’s because those kids are getting less outdoor play, sleep, or face-to-face conversation. Maybe it’s just that families with fewer resources tend to have more screen exposure.

The reality? We don’t have a clean, causal answer. And even if we did, it might be outdated by the time your baby is two; tech moves fast.

What we do know is this:

• Screens displace other important things: like sleep, movement, reading, and parent-child interaction. That’s the opportunity cost.

• Background TV (even if no one’s watching) is linked to lower language and social-emotional skills.

• Co-watching (watching together and talking about it) is linked to stronger language skills.

Your baby doesn’t need a screen. But you might. We’re not here to pretend you’ll never hand your phone to your toddler on a plane. Or after a diaper blowout. Or when you just really, really need a shower.

Screens aren’t inherently evil. But you get to decide when and why they’re used.

So what’s a healthy approach to screen time for little ones?

Here’s what seems to work best:

• Delay it when you can: The younger the baby, the more important it is to prioritize real-world interaction over screens. Infants learn through touch, sound, faces, and movement. Watching even high-quality content doesn’t mean much unless it’s explained by a caregiver in real time.

• Use video calls intentionally: FaceTime or Zoom with grandparents? Great! Narrate what’s happening and help your baby make the connection: “That’s Gigi! Look, she’s waving to you!”

• Pick quality over quantity: When you introduce screens, choose slow-paced, language-rich, non-scary content.

• Watch with them (when you can): Babies and toddlers don’t passively absorb screen content the way adults do. They need your help to make meaning. Even a few minutes of co-viewing makes a big difference. You don’t have to do it every time, but try to when you can.

• Watch the clock, especially before bed: Screen use right before sleep (yes, even for you) is linked to poorer sleep quality. So unless it’s a cozy movie night, aim to power down well before bedtime.

The real secret? Make a plan, not a rulebook

One of the biggest predictors of screen-time meltdowns isn’t the screen itself; it’s the lack of clear boundaries. If your toddler doesn’t know when screen time starts or stops, guess what? They’ll test you. And test you. And test you again.

So: make a plan. Talk with your partner now. Think about your values, your needs, and your routines. Ask things like:

• What will screen time look like in our family?

• Are there “screen-free” zones, like the dinner table or bedroom?

• Will we use it to calm our baby? Entertain them? Bond with them?

• What’s our plan for us and our own screen use?

And then, be willing to revisit that plan. Kids grow, life shifts, technology evolves.

Bottom line? Don't panic. Do be thoughtful.

There are no perfect answers. Some days will include more screens than others. Some days, you'll feel like you're crushing it. Other days, Cocomelon will babysit while you hop on a meeting. It's okay.

What matters most is that your baby feels safe, loved, and connected, and that includes making room for human connection first, and screens second.

And if you ever feel overwhelmed, just remember: Bluey is basically art.

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